Mother Knows Best
Have you ever thought of yourself as a Mother? You might instinctively picture children , and whether you want to be a Mother to them or not. But I'm talking about being a mother to your dreams, your projects - those sort of babies. They also need to be conceived, 'carried' for a time to grown and develop, be birthed, and then be nurtured, protected and encouraged whilst they find their feet in the world.
A mother has exceptional intuition; she taps into this innate, incomprehensible wisdom in order to do what's best for herself and her children. It should be the same for you and your creative projects. You might have to initiate yourself into the role of Mother first however - perhaps a ritual, shared or alone, that marks the moment you consciously decided to embody the Mother archetype, to tap into your intuition, and to trust it.
You might have some healing to do
If your experience of Mothers or Mother figures is not a particularly positive one, it may be harder to connect with the Mothering energy and archetype. Are you often dismissive of your ideas? Do you find it hard to develop them without the encouragement or guidance of loved ones? Do you bother to really celebrate milestones, achievements, or even outcomes that weren't how you envisaged the project going? Are you overly critical of yourself? Do you give yourself a hard time when outcomes aren't as expected or desired? Can you see a link in how your Mother treated you and reacted to your creative endeavours and how you treat yourself and your ideas/projects now?
Perhaps it was another parental or mentor figure who was negative or uncaring about them, and your Mother wasn't able to shield you from their criticism, or put energy into supporting or celebrating your projects and achievements for whatever reason - e.g. illness, busyness, etc.
It is always worth diving into these deep, emotional pools with an accredited professional. There are many types of therapy and we each respond best to different approaches - often by combining a few, either simultaneously or over time. I will provide some resources at the end of this blog.
When you feel ready to initiate yourself as an adoring Mother of your creative projects, try a ritual such as the one below.
Creative Mother Initiation, Solo Ritual Idea:
Create a calm, relaxing space - wear cosy clothes, perhaps put some quiet relaxing music on, light a candle, have a relaxing scent nearby. You might want to re-create conditions that remind you of your own Mother if you are using her as inspiration, and if not, perhaps think about what your "ideal Mother" would wear, smell like, listen to. You might draw inspiration from a figure in history, an archetypal Mother from a story, myth or religion, or perhaps if you want to have children one day - think about what sensory associations you would like them to have of you.
Next, get your journal or some paper and list all of the qualities you admire in Mothers. Think back to your childhood; how did your mother react to your creative projects? How do you wish she would have reacted? What would the ideal Mother say if you came to her with ideas - no matter how 'silly' or 'farfetched'? How would she celebrate you in all the stages of a project; the creative spark/inspired idea, the hard work and dedication to actualising your dream, and either the completion of your project or milestones that mean something to you along the way? What would she physically do? How would you feel in response to this celebration and nurturing?
Now, read back over this list and write what you will do for yourself at each stage of the creative process, in order for your inner creative to feel heard, respected, nurtured, and celebrated.
End the ritual with a vow, written and spoken aloud. You can use this own or write your own:
I vow to become a loving Mother to my creativity.
To earnestly listen to, respect and show-up for my creative ideas and projects.
To be my own biggest cheerleader.
To listen and act upon my deepest intuitions.
To comfort myself when needed, and celebrate every little achievement, milestone, and completion of a project - with the energy it deserves.
To recognise when I need to let go of a project or idea if it's negatively affecting me, no matter how embarrassing or hard it is to walk away from.
To forgive myself if I forget to embody loving Mother energy, and to invite it back in by placing one hand on my heart, one on my belly/womb, and saying: "You are loved, you are safe, I'm sorry, I am here for you again".
If you'd like to work through any issues about your Mother, Mothering Figures or Motherhood, or need or desire mental health support, here is an extensive list of different types of therapies: https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-therapy/types-of-therapy/
You can find out more on how to receive free or reduced rate therapy here: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/talking-therapy-and-counselling/how-to-find-a-therapist/